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dismantling the ethic of domination

In our society, the default norm is to be cisgender and heterosexual. If you’re a man, you are the provider, dominant or aggressive, and stoic. If you’re a woman, you are the main caretaker, submissive or obedient, and emotional. Anything other than this ideal version of what’s considered to be normal is deemed to be “unnatural”, “mentally-ill”, “attention-seeking”, “sinful”, and more. When someone simply exists as a queer or transgender person, it is still inherently seen as something to be ashamed of. In many religions across the world, LGBT+ people are punished and ridiculed for their identity. There are more countries in the world where it’s criminalized to be queer compared to countries where gay marriage is legal. There are 6 countries where the death penalty is imposed on those who are homosexual. No matter what your views on gay marriage may be, this is simply barbaric and inhumane. The fact that there are people who hold genuine malice in their hearts because some people are attracted to the same gender or change their assigned gender at birth will never make sense to me. How does it impact them in any way what other people do in their personal lives? Some people may disagree with me, but I believe that it’s gradually becoming more socially acceptable to be openly bigoted. Just in the United States alone, there was a record-breaking amount of anti LBGT+ legislations that were introduced in 2023. Out of 508 bills that were introduced, 84 of them were passed into law. 

I sometimes find myself accidentally enforcing harmful stereotypes because that is what has been normalized and what people are being exposed to in mainstream media. I challenge this way of thinking and this dominant idea of what it means to be a woman by simply existing as a masculine presenting lesbian. Everyone is different and has their own preferences when it comes to gender presentation. I’m a woman who doesn’t enjoy putting on makeup, dresses, or most feminine things. That doesn’t mean I am superior to other women who do enjoy traditionally feminine things, it just makes me, me.